This may sound strange as for years, I am sure you have been looking to have more balance in your life.
If you're anything like me, you have have been striving for balance like I had for years but never actually achieved it so as a result you end up feeling guilty for being off balance.
I promised myself a few years that I would strive to learn more so that I could be more and live more and what I realised about balance is that it shouldn't be what we are looking for.
I'm asking you to consider becoming off balance on purpose. Now stay with me on this one as when I was first introduced to this theory, I was of a mindset and in a place were I was always thinking that I needed to strive for more balance. After hearing a talk about off balance on purpose it really helped me to change my thinking.
So let's get down to it.
Balance vs Off Balance
Stagnance vs Growth and action
Sameness vs Change
Protecting what is imaginary /unrealistic vs our real natural state of being
Having a little of everything vs Having more of what truly matters
Being unquestionably off balance is more than ok, it's the way it's supposed to be, and if you decide to make the most of it, you can find a new way to manage missteps and create the future you desire so much.
Being off balance on purpose will give you more energy, build more momentum for your life which will propel you forward, ,increase your success and fulfillment and the great thing is that along the way, you'll inspire others with your actions too.
But you may be thinking, what's the alternative to being off balance on purpose?
So my task for you today is to grab yourself a pen and piece of paper and write down which one of these 5 alternatives you are if you're not off balance on purpose.
1. Off Balance Off Purpose - You're off balance but there's nothing you're doing that is fulfilling or purposeful. You attempt to respond to the chaos around you. The trouble is you always feel like you're one step behind. Life just always seems out of control and what you do and your actions don't bring you any joy or meaning to your life or make you feel like you've accomplished something. To fill the void, some people who are off balance off purpose seek pleasure through escapism and sometimes become addicted to unhealthy activities or substances.
2. On Balance Off Purpose - you're diligently working to maintain and protect a false balance. The only way to feel like you are winning this proposition which is life is to constrict your life experience to an increasingly narrow view (in order for my world to make sense, I have to shut out all but a few ideas, responsibilities, relationships and activities). Genuine opportunities often go unconsidered or are cast aside because you don't feel you have the resources to deal with them. They represent disrupters to your fragile state of security. In the process of maintaining this false front, you lose sight of who you are, why you do what you do, and any connection to a compelling mission. Life becomes routine, boring and unsatisfying.
3. On Balance on Purpose - You are connected to your values and missions but again you remain so narrowly constrained that you will never grow to experience true and complete satisfaction. The focus becomes "I have a good thing going here. Better not rock the boat"
You have created your version of the perfect life with safe boundaries and limited requirements for happiness. Everything is in it's place, and you fight to keep disruptions at bay. This situation and the previous one are created by the scarcity mindset, that is, the belief that opportunities are limited so you need to protect what little you have before anyone tries to take it from you.
4. Off Balance By Accident - Anywhere the wind blows, that's all right with me" says the free spirit who is quite comfortable when off balance. If this is you, you enjoy the fact that life is constantly unfolding into new experiences. That's great. But if your path is exclusively accidental, you are missing an opportunity to experience real satisfaction. This condition is a natural phase of life - consider the student who can't decide on course or decides to backpack across Europe to find "herself or himself". It's fun for a while, but most people eventually graduate from this phase of life to find direction to their paths. Seek to discover what you were meant to do then inject that purpose into your life. Otherwise, life becomes a "joyride" and you are repeatedly left thinking "That was fun. Now what? Can't wait to find out". Sometimes the free wheeler becomes a freeloader and imposes on others for life's necessities. When those around become enablers, it becomes even more difficult to discover self-direction.
5. Off Balance On Demand - You are living by someone else's values, goals and beliefs. In the process of trying to be all things to all people ,you lose sight of who you are. Satisfaction stems from external sources and the validation that what you did pleased someone else. You can easily see how this powerless condition takes away the enjoyment of your life as well as your sense of worth. The classic example of this situation is the woman who has spent years focusing on her spouse, children and home and no longer knows who she is. When the nest empties and the next chapter of life begins, she is left wondering what to do. Similarly, the demands of your job can become a substitute for purpose whether or not they have a direct relationship to your values, desires and dreams. When you define who you are by what you do, true satisfaction takes a backseat.
We want abundance not scarcity. The joy of life and positive experiences are limitless and so is your personal potential. Instead of having a life that is pointless, aimless or protected, choose one that is pointed, aimed and propelled towards a compelling target. One that excites you, drives you, and thrills you to become better every single day.
If you're unsure at this moment in life, don't worry. Purpose is revealed to us when we ask the right questions.
The great thing is that you don't have to have all of the answers to begin. To engage life more fully, you first need to embrace it.
If you would like to learn how to do this then if you aren't already a part of my Women Rising Up Group and Ready For More then join it now as this is just one of many areas we will be looking at.
Time to get off balance on purpose.
Let's do this !